End of the semester

I'm halfway through my senior year. My studio is a mess, but my portfolio is rocking. Here's a few images of my workspace.

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The history of the avant-garde; as seen by a worn out, brain dead senior art troll.

Basically, the early modernists/impressionists looked at the salon and went FUCK YOU WE'RE GONNA DO WHAT WE WANT.

And for a while, everyone went with it. The cubists and fauves eventually formed their own special clubs, and everyone looked at it and went "HEY THATS COOL CAN WE JOIN?!" And they said "LOL NO" so the expressionists and futurists made their own special clubs that were similar BUT DIFFERENT from the cubists.

Then WW1 happened and everyone was like "OH SHIT". Cubism, futurism, and expressionism fell out of favor cause they were considered elitist and their intellectual optimism didn't fit with how much the world sucked. Many artists went back to realism, cause well, the world sucked so abstraction and intellectualism was no longer fun.

 The dadaists came forward with a "Everything sucks and nothing makes sense, so our art isn't going to make sense and we're going to point out the fact that the world sucks." They also laughedd at the elitism of ART, and loved mass production, and tried to blur the lines between art and machinery. Everything was art as long as you said it was, ALA Duchamp's ready mades.

 This gave the ability to De stijl, Bauhaus, and the Constructivists to shout "DESIGN AND ARCHITECTURE IS ART TOO GUIS!" and they started mass producing art, and using their artistic skills to design every day objects that were useful. They wanted to bring art and good design to the EVERYMAN.

Surrealism also grew out of Dada, which embraced weirdness for the sake of weird, and trying to bring art back to some basic, subconscious world. They like sex and thought Freud was a cool guy.

Then the Nazis (and Commies) came and chased them all out to America or killed them cause they were a weird bunch of freaks anyways.

THE END

Epilogue: In AMURIKAFUCKYEAH they all invented a NEW INTERNATIONAL STYLE YO and made lots of money that they cried themselves to sleep on cause they were so misunderstood.

Epilogue II: The Americans they taught to be weird freaks were used by the CIA to defeat the RED BASTARD COMMIES and bring INDIVIDUALITY back to Europe.

Epilogue III- Feminism rejects the PHALLUS and celebrates the VAGINA that gave birth to POST MODERNISM. Pie was served by Ms. Chicago.

Epilogue IIII- Post modernism looks at this shit, calls modernists a bunch of FUCKING PROGRESSIVE OPTIMISTS who succeeded at NOTHING, and turns art into irony and cynicism. They declare Duchamp a god and TROLL ON.

Midterm Painting Crit

Man oh man, I just had my first painting crit yesterday.


I was sort of expecting to get ripped, My paintings are weird, especially next to everyone else in my studio, who's work is either super illustrative(people trying to get into gaming and concept art) or people trying to be Lucian Freud and Jenny Saville. Not that there's anything wrong with that, those painters are amazing, but that's just not where I am right now.

 So after critting a few lovely figurative works, and some great fantastical landscapes, we come to my quirky cities. At first, I was met with silence. Dead silence. My stomach fell. Silence is never good. Ever. But slowly, someone piped up about my neon, vibrant colors. There was also talk about my mark making. My professor posed the question of whether I'm naive or sophisticated.

Some of the ways my classmates described my paintings made me laugh. Vibrant, gutsy, aggressive, childish, nervous, and plenty of attitude. Things that describe me more than my paintings. One thing that was noted is I'm much more process oriented than content oriented. I'm constructing these spaces with nothing more than formal issues in mind, and just trying to have fun with quirky, confusing, and odd spaces. (Which harkens back to a comment my professor made to me that I'm having "too much fun" with these partings. Har Har)

But I have never heard my professor speak to highly of a students work during crit. He said that he loved where I was going, and was excited to see what happens next. I was so scared for this semester, since he's a very critical teacher, and often speaks so deeply and philosophically that I thought I might not understand anything, and butt heads constantly.
 
There were things that needed help, especially speaking about the content of my work. But all in all, there as nothing negative about my finished painting. the one I had started last week had much more wrong with it, but that's because it was only started a week ago. Things like I was being too self conscious, too controlling with the paint and marks. So I went in and I loosened up, and purposely messed a few things up. The image above about is just a corner of the painting- part of it that's working very well.

First Project's In!

It's been a whirlwind of a few weeks. You know you're in for a time consuming semester when you're handed the first assignment before the syllabus. That on top of 2 jobs and theory readings? Man, I'm just glad I have time to sleep! (I'm trying REAL hard to keep this thing going though. Really). Actually, not really. While I'm pretty busy with homework and studio, I seem to have a lot more time at home, and have been getting pretty good sleep. My roommates this year totally rule, and they're (trying) to teach me how to cook. Handling food jointly and cooking IS way cheaper, so I'm perfectly okay with that. No ramen either! Yay!

Anyway, last week, or was it the week before that? I turned in my first sculpture project. I was working with some old ideas. The last 2 times I wanted to work with these concepts I got shot down and told my ideas were "vandalism" Pfffffft. Lamers have no sense of fun, right?  

School Has Started

School's back. Been back for like, 3 weeks now? Whoops. I've been so busy getting into the motions that I haven't really had time or energy to update- but hopefully that'll change and I'll make a habbit of updating at LEAST once a week. Yay.

It's weird not being in 3 studios. Only having 2 art classes is really throwing me off. I have more 'free time' but a LOT more readings to do. Theory and Early modern are really killing me, and they really make me think way too much. I'd rather be spending all that time actually painting than spending whole days reading.

 I've really missed the studio. More of the group feel, and the constant feedback and help with my work. I already feel like I have stronger work and a better direction.

And yes, my studio is clean. It won't be for long.

I'll update later with some of my drawings and other fun things I've been up to, with more info on how my process has grown and changed.

Road Trip! Pt1

No real drawings for this one folks, I'm on the road, so no scanner! (Might be able to swing a few photos of the sketchbook though, I'll keep in touch!)


Anyway,  as said in my last post, school starts next week. (bleh)

And in ONE LAST DITCH ATTEMPT to embrace the freedom given to me and my mother by being an unemployed 20-something college student living at home and a stay at home mom/freelance photographer, respectively, we decided to hop in the car, and see where the road would take us.

Option 1 was west. Towards the mountains. Towards Yellowstone. It'd be a loooooong drive, flat, but with seriously awesome results.

Option 2 was south. More mountains. a road well traveled, but a place we really do love.

 

Option 3 was to the East, and slightly north. Towards ocean breezes, mountains, and awesome fishy foods.



Well, we chose one of these options, and piled our stuff in the car. BIG pile there. And we drove.

 I have photos from some of our stops, and rambles about our adventures that I'll post as  I feel like it, and plenty after the fact! I'm not even posting on facebook where I am. That's half the fun.

Figuring Stuff Out

 

So, I was getting ready to start a new painting last night, when it hit me. I have a week and a half till classes start. I'm going to be on a road trip for that entire time. So as much as  I really want to paint, I'm going to sit, do a few more drawings and small paper paintings, and wait to do the BIG stuff once classes start up again. I'll have a studio space, I'll have 12-20 hours a week of required work time, I'll have friends to bounce ideas off of and pull be away once I get to the point of having a staring contest with my work. I'll have other distractions, too, but yeah, it'll be nice to get back into a setting where it's easy to find someone to talk about my work with. 

 I'll start with the ideas I have now, and I'm sure that as the semester goes on, they'll grow and change and I'll be pushed to do something different. But at least I have something interesting to start with now, unlike last semester, where I was overwhelmed not knowing what to do, and with no help or guidance to figure it out.  Now that I have something to start with, I'll have something to move forward with. I'll also have art history and art theory classes to help me think and keep me reading. In fact, the only non-art class I have is a feminist theory class that also involves video games. Which, while not art related, is still super cool and I'm sure I'll have lots of fun with it. No Japanese this semester either, which is very odd for me. I'll hopefully keep up with it, especially since one of my roommates is taking it.  

I'm glad I took this summer to focus on art. I've made a lot of good friends in IRC and other forums, and I've gotten a bit more confident about my work. My ideas have solidified to  something that looks good and I can defend easier than shit I did last semester.  I got nearly an entire sketchbook of drawings, a chunk of small paintings, and one really strong painting that will be a spring board for even more.  

These drawings are all pulled from the sketchbook. They're quick studies, or slightly more developed ideas. I'm still stuck on the city, with its overwhelming architecture, light, and crowds. I loved the idea of being isolated in those crowds, yet infinitely bombarded with so much stimulation. So I'm taking some of the city scapes I did in response to NYC and Time Square, and trying to introduce figure into it. The figures need to be stylized to fit into that space sensibly, which is what I'm still trying to figure out. My earliest days of drawing is starting to peek through, and so is my love of cartoons, anime, and comics. Which, oddly enough, is something my professors have been encouraging me to pull into my art for a while. I'm fluent in Japanese, and have spent so long studying the art and culture, it seems odd that there's only hints of the influence in my work.

 

I think I can actually do this.

 

It was weird. I've been doubting myself, my abilities and my path in the arts for years. Art school's supposed to tear you down and build you back up, and while I've had a TON of fun these past few years, I've felt less assured and confident in my abilities and artistic voice than when I first started... I've been struggling to put things together and express myself. I look into big name grad programs and think I could never, EVER do that. Just the thought of applying makes me a bit queezy. I hear about teachers and mentors selling paintings for about 100,000 dollars, and think, man, that's got to be the life. Sell one painting a year, and you live pretty comfortably. And think I'll never get there.


At the opening for One New Painting, that changed a bit. I realized that I might be able to pull it off. As amazing as all those other works were, mine did hold up. I saw a lot of things in these paintings that I wanted to emulate, and a lot of things that just stunned me as far as how they did that. But again, mine held up pretty well. I was the youngest of the show. The least experienced of the group, yet, you couldn't tell that at first glance.


Instead of being ignored or ripped into by the rest of the painters for being a young upstart shithead, who was only in the show because I knew the owner of the gallery, which I was half expecting, I got a lot of amazing feedback on my work. I got a lot of words of advice and encouragement. I had established artists ask me who my dealer was, and what galleries I show in full-time. I heard a lot of stories about their art school exploits and early work. I was stunned by myself, too. I was able to intelligently explain and defend my choices in my work, and asked intelligent questions from them as well, too. There were no harsh words, just pieces of advice and inquisitive questions that got my thinking about future paintings, and how to approach my work.


And by the end of the night, my feet sore from the 6 inch heels I had decided to wear, a bit tipsy from the wine I had, and my make up smudged cause it was really bloody hot in there, the thought hit me:

I might actually be able to do this art thing after all. 

Another Opening

My painting next to a portrait by Heather Stormer

Well, One New Painting opened this past Friday. You know, the show I've been freaking myself out over. Yeah. that one. Painting finally got done, ahead of time, for once, and brought into the shop. I helped clean and hang the show. There were a few paintings in the group that I seriously wish I could do. The use of color and mark and sheer drawing ability in every singe piece was just stunning and made me feel like I knew nothing about painting or drawing- until I realized that those painters have a good 30 or 40 years on me, and a degree or two more than me. The ones I talked to told me about the work they were doing at my age, and made me feel a bit better about what I'm doing now. But still, something to aspire too, I guess. I heard a lot of stories from their days as students, and about the work they were doing at my age. Seriously fun stuff.

There had to be well over 100 people that milled through there and saw the art, had a few glasses of wine, and just talked with everyone else. A good chunk of my friends showed up, some from high school and some from college, which was a real relief to see familiar friendly faces in the crowd. A lot of people I spoke to didn't quite believe I was one of the artists at first, and the one that did didn't believe I was still a student. The ones who thought I was one of the artists thought I already had full gallery representation and dealers. Which made me nervous and massively caught me off guard. I'm still a student. While yes, I do have time to be entering some shows, the idea of actual representation and actually working with a gallery is so far out of my mind right now....

Most people just commented on my hair or my zombie heels. Which leads to a great piece of advice I got during the night "The only ones that make it in this business are the ones with big personalities or rich friends" I seem to have both going for me. So there's hope. Kind of.

The REAL kicker of the night was when Michael Scott showed up. With his own bottle of tequila and limes. He'd told everyone he had an event on the other side of the country to be at. So the entire gallery went silent when he just walked in, since everyone knew who he was, and he's kind of a big deal. And he lives on the other side of the country. I honestly didn't get to speak to him too much. It was a wee bit intimidating just to be in a show with him, much less actually talk to the guy about art.

It was a fun, exhausting, and somewhat intimidating night. I met a lot of people, got a lot of great feedback and comments on my painting, and got a lot of words of encouragement. It'll be great to see the show over the next few weeks, and hopefully the shop will do more things like this in the future.


More photos to come as I get them.

Staring Contest

Every artist hits this stage.

You know, when you've finally nearly resolved a piece, but it's not quite singing yet- it's not quite there. But you don't know what it needs.


I hate this stage. I feel like I'm having a staring contest with my painting. I feel like it's winning. All of a sudden, my work flow grinds to a hault, and I'm just stuck there looking and staring at my drawing or painting, trying to figure out what it needs. It's really really annoying. During the school year I can wander off and go work on another project. Sometimes the solution will come to me, and if not, I can pester someone else in the studio for help. Or ask my professor. Or it will suddenly hit me during crit, and I can beg my way into making those final tweaks before it gets turned in.

Well, it's summer. I 'd have 3 studios with hard deadlines. I don't have like, 5 projects and 3 papers happening right now. I don't have any else in the studio, and I don't have anyone else but me to be held accountable. I don't even really have any deadlines. It's an odd feeling. There's a few people who I can send quick cellphone snaps to who can give me feedback- there's always my old teacher down the street who I can cart my work over to... But there's usually no one right there. Just me.

So I'm learning to have my own conversation with the painting. And trying to learn how to win the staring contest. I'm binging on reference photos and other art blogs. I've found some really inspiring stuff, and I've been doing a lot of drawings and studies from them.

I've also started a few more projects. Have ideas for plenty more. My lovely leather sketchbook is actually over halfway full. Maybe I can fill it up in the next month and send it off to get it refilled!


here's some fun experiments I've done:

I'm working on acidic color schemes. Really trying to make pretty, eye catching, but uncomfortable images.

Show Opening

It's been a rather uneventful week. Except for the one show opening last friday, and it's now been extended a good month. It was a pretty awesome turnout, and my work looks amazing all matted and framed. I was lucky enough to get some prime placement on the back gallery wall, too. Three of my pieces were grouped together, and look really stunning. It's so odd to see these loose drawings, that were no more than studies that usually end up on my studio floor or at the bottom of a pile, end up framed and matted on a gallery wall- and to hear and see people admiring them. I've been so self conscious about my art- not many people like gestural, expressive art. Say it's too sloppy and unrefined. Well- these drawings certainly didn't look sloppy or unrefined once I put nice matts and frames on them.

The opening was packed. At one point in time it was really hard to move around and see the art, there were so many people. A lot of people say art is dead, and it's becoming harder and harder to make it as an artist- if that night was any indication, it might just be that Cincinnati has a small, but strong art community. Everyone was really nice, and I met a lot of great local artists, and saw a few familiar faces. I honestly think I was the youngest artist in the show. Everyone was asking me where else I exhibit, what my website is, and where I got my training. They were a bit stunned to hear I'm still just a student, at a school not known for it's art, but they were really encouraging and gave me lots of advice for the future.

In fact, a number of pieces sold that night! Not any of mine, but here's hoping I sell at least one. That would be nice, classes are starting up soon, and I'm in two art history classes, meaning I'm going to end up spending a lot of money on books that I don't really look at much. Well, I might actually read the theory book, but I probably won't understand it. Also, I need to restock on paints, brushes, and paper before heading back to the Ox Box. Just thinking about it makes my bank account cry.

Show's open till the end of August, at the Red Tree Gallery in Cincinnati, Ohio. 

Go see it! Its really cool

Lesson Learned. Again

So. I'm a night owl. This should be pretty public knowledge by now. It's working out well for me right now because I can paint in the garage when it's cool, and there's no one around to pester me.
Well, last night I returned to my painting and made some pretty heavy revisions. After midnight. That was mistake 1, right?

I both solved a bunch of problems and caused a new one of this huuuuge imbalance in composition. I snapped this photo, asked a few of my IRC and AIM buddies for help. They gave me some helpful advice, and I decided to go forward with some changes and clean up. It was now ebbing up on 5am.

Unexpected Studio Visit

The painting I'm actually working on is coming along nicely. It's large, and brightly colored. There's some problems with it still, but it's coming along nicely. 20 days-ish to finish it up. Scary deadline. Any ideas, criticisms, or suggestions will be gladly accepted. <3

WIP, a New Show, and Other Updates

Big News!

See see see?  My name's on that!! There's going to be a band and the typical opening wine and cheese stuff. But it's going to be a pretty kick ass show open through Labor Day, so try to make it if you're in the area!

Oh Man... Good news and bad news.

Sorry for the quiet on my end everyone, life's been happening. If you don't want to know about it- here's the pretty pictures first, and then the news!!!

The most important part is the art. I've been doing more NYC paintings. Some of these are completely finished, others aren't quite there yet. I really wanted to get more of these done, but they take a surprising amount of time and effort for such little pieces. It's also becoming a challenge to keep from repeating myself, and make all of these paintings different enough that I don't get bored with them. That's why I'm jumping at the chance to make a big one and experiment on a larger scale. I'm having a ton of fun with the mixed media, so that will probably stick around even after I move on from this subject matter.

They're all 8x14, pastel and acrylic, on Stonehenge paper. They're cute little big paintings, I suppose.

 

The Pool on a Nice Sunny Day

So, yesterday my page veiws spiked to well over 100, nearly 150. It was amazing to see, if not confusing, exciting, and nerve wracking. I wasn't expecting so much traffic, so much success at this whole blogging thing so quickly. Even if it was just one spike, one little fluke, it was still nice to realize that so many people were interested enough to look at my work. This blog was mostly a way to get my thoughts down, and to start holding myself accountable for my own marketing, archiving, and promotion as an artist. I have two semesters left before I go out into the big scary world. Any advice or words of wisdom would be greatly apprciated. I'm adsorbing as much as I can, but still, some words direct from the source would be nice. :)

I wish I had more paintings like those to show, but those take time- I'm getting some more laid out, and hopefully I'll be able to finish them during class time tomorrow.

See, right now I'm crashing at a friend's apartment during the week for class. It's about the most happening place Oxford has during the summer, due to is large pool and multiple hot tubs. It's a great place to meet new people, even ones that aren't students and don't live there! It's also about the only thing to do, since this bodunk college town is all but deserted. It's an idylic little place with cobble stone streets and wonderful restaurants, but there's not much to do since everyone's gone and I'm very broke. Maybe I'll wander around uptown tomorrow and do some drawings up there since it's no longer overran by drunks and frat guys.

 So of course, with no real homework, no money to spend, and few of my friends in town- I've been spending afternoons down by the pool, trying to work on my pasty complexion, and of course, doodling away in my sketchbook. I've never been one to sit still, so just laying back and relaxing isn't for me. Most girls were just napping or reading, and the guys weren't all that active either, but it made for a good opportunity to draw some foreshortened nearly nude figures.

I'm still not real used to the texture of the handmade paper in my sketchbook, but it seems to hold pen decently, and it's a great conversation piece. It scans pretty decently as well.Has a nice old feeling to it.  And smell. Gotta love that smell.

Times Square Paintings.

So, I've finally started work on my project inspired by NYC...

I'm doing a series of small drawings based off of the many photos and drawings I got of Times Square and the rest of the city. I just can't forget all that electricity, all the energy, all those people and lights. The city is something I've looked too in photos and in memory for inspiration. I keep coming back to it. My brief experience in Tokyo as high schooler, to all the photos I've seen of Seoul and Hong Kong, and now I've finally experienced NYC.

There are all 8x14, acrylic and pastel on stonehenge paper.  Some of these might be reworked or tweeked, as I plan to eventually bring them all together in an installation-like piece.You can kind of see where the bottom two are going to eventually line up if I go ahead with that idea.

Storm King Art Center

On the last day of our trip, we went off to Storm King. It was really amazing to see so many large scale pieces of work, but it was hotter than hell, and most of us had worn jeans expecting cooler weather. We took the tram around the park, and then did some wandering of our own. I wandered to Andy Goldsworthy's Storm King Wall, which was quite cool, and over to Maya Lin's Wave Field... Which was amazing. It really did look like a sea made of grasses, especially since it was a bit over grown. Alenander Caulder's large scale pieces were cool, though I wasn't impressed with De Survero's. Mostly because my sculpture professor makes fun of him so much. I see why- it's well designed, but there's nothing too exciting or interesting about it.

 

Midnight in Manhatten

On the last night of NYC, I wanted to go back to Time Square and draw, since I'd wasted a lot of the time I had there wandering and getting lost and just being way overwhelmed. My teacher was a tad bit peeved at me for that bi of a stunt( I hadn't told her I was going...whoops) and I had also spent that entire day wandering by myself as well, I decided it best to stay in and chill out. I found myself on top of a 14 story building in the middle of Manhattan, no more than 3 blocks from Time Square. As the night went on, I had fun watching people in all the open windows, and I noticed that each light that was on was someone that was awake, just like I was.

I pointed this out to the drunk girl shouting obscenities at pedestrians below. Her mind was blown, and she quickly sat down with me to enjoy the night quietly in a drunken, contemplative stupor. She saw a light turn on about 1am, and her mind was blown again.

These were all done with water soluble graphite, and micron pen. 

Classmates and passers by

In NYC, there was a lot of downtime. In cafes, museums, and some central park nap time. A lot of times I just drew my classmates, teacher, or other pedestrians that were interesting. Mostly very gestural and just figure practice, but I've always loved gesture, and bringing the motion of a figure to the page.

Pencil, water soluable graphite, and micron pens. <3<3 

After the jump. 

Traveling

 Drawings done via travel, airport, plane, train, bus ect. during the NYC trip. I chose random forms, lines and objects I saw passing by and started to draw as I attempted to arrange the page in an interesting way.

 

Micron pen, at the airport.

More after break. 

Time Square Drawings

Recently, I had the amazing chance to spend a week in NYC. I'm currently sifting through my sketchbook and scanning groups of drawins that turned out well. These are all from near the end of the trip, when I wandered out at night, and sat down in Time Square to do some drawings. 

I don't know. There was something absolutely overwhelming about Time Square. It might be the absolute sea of people, all the lights, adds, noises and smells, but I finally found a place that embodies what I've been trying to figure out. There's such an electric feeling, with such a bombardment of information, adds, and videos. There's people all over, some ignoring you, some hassling you to come to their shop, bar, or show. When the metaverse is created, it will look like times square.